Hello there. I sure do need to slow down. I'm exhausted from all of my man eating! Pass me the salt and pepper please. Nom nom nom!
I met up with Hull Guy and he was absolutely lovely. He was completely on my level, and we even took the piss out of the couple on the table next to us who were quite obviously on a first date and having that first date discussion. It feels like I've known Hull Guy for ages, and I was really at home with him. Promising.
From the delicious steak house, we went to a cocktail bar where I had a... ahem... virgin cocktail. Gosh, it's been a while since I've had that word associated with me!
As we walked past the town hall which was lit up beautifully, he kissed me. And it was perfect. We made our way to his car, and his hands were wondering as we got lost around the city. I told him no and that I wanted to be respected. Good girl!
Didn't last long!
He pulled up in front of mine and we kissed and kissed and kissed some more. His hands wondered, and I let them. Oops. I told you that I wasn't much of a lady!
He begged to come in to my house so he could make me orgasm. Well, OK, just one but then you have to leave. And one orgasm later (not through sex) he wouldn't leave. He kept kissing me and telling me he wanted to give me one more. At 2.30am, I was sleepy and reminded him that he had a long drive home. But he kept kissing me as I led him towards the door. Hint hint, right? Such a pain in my ass. No wait, I mean a pain in my neck. 2 days later and my neck still hurts from kissing the 6ft man. I need to find a shorter guy. Not even Deep Heat has helped!
Yesterday I received numerous messages from him saying that I was beautiful, pretty and that he hoped that I liked him. This all seems a bit needy to me. He noticed I went a little quiet and mentioned it, and I had to say that he seems a little intense. Don't call me heartless, but he is a little lost puppy. A cute one at that. He's even admitted that girls walk all over him because he's like this. I really don't want to be one of them. He needs to man up a bit.
Right, who's next? Any takers? OK, you there. Yes, you. Mexico Guy come on up. Myself and Mexico Guy have already had some fun Skyping. So it was decided today that we'd have some fun on Skype whilst I had a 'sexy' shower. Trust me when I say that there was nothing at all sexy about this.
Let's look back at the title of this post. Sissy Spacek. Who's that? Well, she's an actress known for her roles in Four Christmases (2008) and The Help (2011). Hmm, wait. Wasn't she in another film? Wasn't it a classic horror film from 1976 about a teenage girl who has telekinesis? Carrie!
I'm certainly not a teenage girl and I do not possess the powers of telekinesis. So how can this Skype ever relate to Sissy Spacek? Let me take you about 40 minutes prior to the Skype message. I had started to dye my hair red. The shower was to take the dye out of my hair. Wrong time to Skype.
It looked like a bloodbath. Not only that, because I had the shower door open, the dye sprayed everywhere and now I have to do a boil wash for the bath mat.
Note to self: try not to look like Carrie covered in blood when you're trying to be sexy in the shower.
Sunday 6 January 2013
Friday 4 January 2013
Chest pains
The date with Academic Guy did not go particularly well. Not only was he incredibly boring and dull, but I had to leave early.
He's from Yorkshire and I adore the accent, but apart from that it was hard work. Anyone who knows me will say that I can talk for England. I don't really have an issue with talking to new people, and the problem is shutting me up. However, I just did not want to talk to this guy at all. He'd ask me a question and I would give a one word answer. I know that probably sounds rude, but I just didn't want to be there. I knew I should have cancelled. It was just terrible.
After having a rather lovely dinner of sausage and mash with gravy, I started to get chest pains. I've eaten my food a little too quickly there, haven't I? Oh well, I'm sure the pain will go shortly. 20 minutes later I was dizzy and the pain had worsened. I apologised and felt awful, but I had to leave.
As soon as I got in, I whipped my bra off, lay down for 5 minutes and I was fine again.
It wasn't an excuse to get out of a date, although I'm not sure how much longer I could've stayed there.
I was supposed to be meeting my fuck buddy, Tattoo Guy, this evening but he's cancelled due to injury. Oh what to do? I start speaking to Hull Guy. He wants to take me out for dinner. Tonight. It's currently 5.35pm and he's just popped into the shower and then he's driving down. I've booked us a table at a beautiful restaurant and this night is very unexpected.
Apologies but I need to go and get ready for a random date with a man from Hull.
He's from Yorkshire and I adore the accent, but apart from that it was hard work. Anyone who knows me will say that I can talk for England. I don't really have an issue with talking to new people, and the problem is shutting me up. However, I just did not want to talk to this guy at all. He'd ask me a question and I would give a one word answer. I know that probably sounds rude, but I just didn't want to be there. I knew I should have cancelled. It was just terrible.
After having a rather lovely dinner of sausage and mash with gravy, I started to get chest pains. I've eaten my food a little too quickly there, haven't I? Oh well, I'm sure the pain will go shortly. 20 minutes later I was dizzy and the pain had worsened. I apologised and felt awful, but I had to leave.
As soon as I got in, I whipped my bra off, lay down for 5 minutes and I was fine again.
It wasn't an excuse to get out of a date, although I'm not sure how much longer I could've stayed there.
I was supposed to be meeting my fuck buddy, Tattoo Guy, this evening but he's cancelled due to injury. Oh what to do? I start speaking to Hull Guy. He wants to take me out for dinner. Tonight. It's currently 5.35pm and he's just popped into the shower and then he's driving down. I've booked us a table at a beautiful restaurant and this night is very unexpected.
Apologies but I need to go and get ready for a random date with a man from Hull.
Wednesday 2 January 2013
'Tis the season to be horny!
Fa la la la la la la la la!
So, since my last blog I've been horny as hell. But not even the devil could seduce me. That's right - I've been ready to jump on it, but there are no suitable trampolines available. That's a lie, there are. Alas, I'm a good girl (I'm being very picky).
Let's start with Mexicio Guy. I used to work abroad in America with lots of other Americans. And in particular, Mexico Guy (one of the Americans). We always got on and I liked him, but I was in a relationship and I was being a good girl.
After 4 years we had exchanged brief messages on Facebook, but not much else. We chatted the other day and I decided to invite him to Cancun with me. It was a throw away comment but he has accepted. We've been chatting non-stop since through WhatsApp and Skype. He keeps saying extremely romantic things to me, and in Spanish too (his family are from South America). So I've been giggling like a school girl.
The issue is that he really likes me after 5 days. He's even planning the wedding. And if you think I'm joking, I'm not. I was sending him the link to the hotel I want to stay at in Cancun and he sent me a picture of the hotel's wedding brochure.
Pros -
Cons -
So, my holiday romance in Cancun is sorted out! At least we have a stunning setting. I'll be happy as long as this doesn't happen:
There's Hull Guy who is from Hull. We've been talking for a couple of days and he seems really into me too. I don't know what I'm giving out at the moment, but I wish it would stop.
Hull Guy is sweet. He has his own business, is writing a book, and has beautiful green eyes. We spoke quite a lot last night. He wants to come down to where I live (about 2/3 hour drive) tonight. But that leads me on to...
Academic Guy! That sounds like he has special powers. Yes, let me introduce you to Academic Guy!
He lectures at a pretty good university, but in a boring subject. This is really bothering me. It's in Economics. Now, I don't like to judge people but I appreciate humanities rather than numbers. Numbers are boring. Yawn. So, I'm currently getting ready for date numero uno with Academic Guy. I've already pushed it back 40 minutes so I can write this post for you. And as apprehensive as I am, we're going to a really nice pub and I'm going to order their amazing bangers and mash. Ooh, I do love a good sausage!
So, since my last blog I've been horny as hell. But not even the devil could seduce me. That's right - I've been ready to jump on it, but there are no suitable trampolines available. That's a lie, there are. Alas, I'm a good girl (I'm being very picky).
Let's start with Mexicio Guy. I used to work abroad in America with lots of other Americans. And in particular, Mexico Guy (one of the Americans). We always got on and I liked him, but I was in a relationship and I was being a good girl.
After 4 years we had exchanged brief messages on Facebook, but not much else. We chatted the other day and I decided to invite him to Cancun with me. It was a throw away comment but he has accepted. We've been chatting non-stop since through WhatsApp and Skype. He keeps saying extremely romantic things to me, and in Spanish too (his family are from South America). So I've been giggling like a school girl.
The issue is that he really likes me after 5 days. He's even planning the wedding. And if you think I'm joking, I'm not. I was sending him the link to the hotel I want to stay at in Cancun and he sent me a picture of the hotel's wedding brochure.
Pros -
- Has a very good job.
- If we do get together, I could move to the US.
- He's very romantic.
- He's bi-lingual and I love that!
- We have a connection through where we used to work.
Cons -
- He lives 4,326.1 miles away (yes, I've looked).
- We're going on our first date in 204 days.
- Our next date would probably be 204 days after that.
- He seems to really like me after a short amount of time and I'm not quite sure how to take that.
So, my holiday romance in Cancun is sorted out! At least we have a stunning setting. I'll be happy as long as this doesn't happen:
There's Hull Guy who is from Hull. We've been talking for a couple of days and he seems really into me too. I don't know what I'm giving out at the moment, but I wish it would stop.
Hull Guy is sweet. He has his own business, is writing a book, and has beautiful green eyes. We spoke quite a lot last night. He wants to come down to where I live (about 2/3 hour drive) tonight. But that leads me on to...
Academic Guy! That sounds like he has special powers. Yes, let me introduce you to Academic Guy!
He lectures at a pretty good university, but in a boring subject. This is really bothering me. It's in Economics. Now, I don't like to judge people but I appreciate humanities rather than numbers. Numbers are boring. Yawn. So, I'm currently getting ready for date numero uno with Academic Guy. I've already pushed it back 40 minutes so I can write this post for you. And as apprehensive as I am, we're going to a really nice pub and I'm going to order their amazing bangers and mash. Ooh, I do love a good sausage!
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